Latta Nigel - a psychologist from New Zealand, he is called a real magician in modern child psychology. Latta Nigel has been practicing for 16 years, and is recognized as an expert on neglected and hopeless cases.
His acquired knowledge is needed not only in those families where difficult children live, but also in ordinary ones. Thanks to the basic principles that he identified in education, it is possible to achieve mutual understanding with the child. The child will not perceive parents as enemies, and be closed from them, but will be friendly.
If you only want to have children, then it will be useful for you to read this article. You will already know how to behave and make no mistakes in education.
10. Develop a relationship
People are used to developing relationships with their friends, partners, but for some reason they forget to do this with their children.
A child is the same person, and he not only needs to be scolded or praised, to evaluate actions from the point of view of the parent, but to communicate and try to understand him.
The child must be treated as a person and with respect. By your example, you teach your child to interact with other people, and the attitude should be human, sincere.
Many parents make one big mistake - they bully a child if he does something wrong. One day he will grow up and will no longer be afraid of you, but he certainly will not have an incentive to observe morality.
9. Give attention
Young children are very greedy for attention - they need a lot of it, almost in excess. It is never enough, and to get it, children resort to various tricks.
For example, many children, having learned that parents notice their whims, often use them for their own purposes. That's just it turns against them.
The thing is that children have a natural instinct - they feel safe next to their parents and are ready to do everything so that you do not leave them for a minute. If you leave the child unattended for a long time, then by his pampering he will suck all the juices out of you.
8. Show sympathy
All children have an innate feeling that their parents love them. Even if you scold and punish your child - he still believes in your love. But if we talk about sympathy, then this is completely different.
Children feel that strangers are indifferent to them and relate even with a chill. They feel just as well if their parents do not like them.
Parents know what love is, but they show love with difficulty. Parental love is an instinct, and sympathy can arise if you like what your child does and you enjoy his personality.
Try to pay more attention to your child, take an interest in him, and educate in him the person you like.
7. Set boundaries
Sometimes some parents do not set boundaries for their children and let their upbringing drift. What will come of this? Nothing good. Moms are afraid to limit their children in something, because they are small and fragile, and their psyche will be damaged by whims.
If you allow your children everything, then they will become real monsters.
Do not be afraid to spoil the relationship with your child - set him severe restrictions and say: “It is impossible” if he commits bad deeds. Then the moment will soon come when he will remember that “it is impossible”, and you can breathe calmly.
6. Encourage the good
Did you like what the child did? Encourage him for it. The fact is that when a child feels your satisfaction with him, then any qualities will grow in him.
The main rule is to ignore bad deeds, but always notice good ones and praise them. Tell your child as often as possible that you are satisfied with his good behavior.
If you do not like his vagaries - do not talk about it and demonstrate your discontent. Time will pass, and the child, not having received your attention, will cease to act up himself.
5. Follow the sequence
For the same actions you do not need to praise or punish, follow the sequence. Nobody said that it is easy to be a parent, but you yourself have chosen it.
For the sake of peace, the parent may begin to behave inappropriately, but the child will not understand why something that he was previously praised for is now ignored.
Try not to confuse your child - if for something you praised him - continue to do it, if something is “impossible”, then let it remain banned, even though you are in a good mood.
4. Do not forgive
Parents are very wrong when they forgive their child for bad behavior. Children learned that if they did something bad, time will pass and their parents will forgive them.
If a child insults his parents, behaves badly, and arranges tantrums - there is no need to forgive this. If the child has inappropriate behavior, this should not only be ignored, but suppressed.
At the same time, one does not need to suppress the will of his child - he may have his own opinion, he can argue with you, but treating without respect does not.
Controversy, on the contrary, is a very important element in communicating with a child - they mean that he is growing as an independent person and can think himself.
3. Behavior - communication
Parents sometimes do not understand that their behavior wants the child to convey something to them. This is not always done consciously, but he wants to attract attention.
Even if your child behaves very badly - in this way he tries to communicate something. Bad behavior can also mean that you educate him incorrectly, encouraging in those situations in which you do not need, do not pay attention.
Pay attention to what your child is doing. What does he want to say by this? You, as a parent, must find out.
2. Do not fight
Children are always chaos, confusion, turmoil that you are not able to handle ... If you led a calm, measured life on a schedule, then with the advent of children it changes.
Your order can be destroyed at any time, and you need to put up with it. If you do not, then chaos will defeat you.
If insanity has begun - your child is naughty, arguing, offending you - wait this moment, after the storm the sun will surely appear.
1. Make a plan
Children are different - some are more calm, while others are uncontrollable. The second is harder. Therefore, if you want to raise an uncontrollable child, you need a plan.
Choose a behavior that does not suit you in the child and write about it on a piece of paper. Write down the ideas that you find most effective in dealing with bad behavior.
Try to stick to your plan, and remember that there are always ways to overcome any difficulty.